My Teen is on Probation and Constantly in Trouble
What can I do before it's too late?
To most of us parents, the worst thing that can ever happen to our kids is when they get charged with a criminal offense. But a crime is a crime and no matter the outcome, your teen needs to accept the consequences of his deeds. For minors under the statutory age of majority - 18 years old in most countries - the most common sentencing option given by the juvenile court is probation.
The general terms of probation require the teenager's compliance with the conditions set in the court’s disposition order. So if your teen is suspected of violating a probation condition, he runs a risk of having his probation option revoked by the court and possibly be imposed a harsher sentence, such as incarceration at a detention facility.
So how do you keep a teenager who is under probation and yet cannot stay away from trouble? Here are some tips that will help you control your teen.
Impose Rules and Regulations in the House
If a child learns how to follow the rules in the house, he will also learn how to follow rules outside the house. Setting up house rules and regulations is a way of teaching youngsters how to follow public law and respect authority later on. Take note, there should be consequences in case your teen chooses to break the rules. Non-negotiable punishment should be given in case the rules are broken - or your rules will be worthless.
If you are stumped on what kind of rules and regulations you can impose in the house, here are some for starters.
- Assigning chores, e.g. taking out the trash, washing the dishes, taking out the linen, should be done without complications.
- Inappropriate language, inappropriate behavior, and inappropriate activities are not allowed in the house. Examples would be no use of profane language, no improper body language and no smoking or drinking of alcohol inside the house
- Cursing, screaming and verbal abuse, including back talking, eye rolling and improper body language, will be not allowed in the house
- The room is to be kept clean
- No loud, disruptive noise or music
- Respect for personal and public property
- Respect for personal space
Distance Your Teen From Bad Peer Relationships
Parents have every reason to worry about their teenagers associate themselves with known thugs and gang members. It has been brought about hundreds of times already that gangs are responsible for a large proportion of all violent offenses in most cities.
As a parent dedicated to your son's welfare, it is natural to be alarmed after finding out that your son is involved in a gang. Take note, teens who may be involved in gang activity usually display multiple instances of the following signs:
- associated with known gang members
- makes use of gang speak and signs to communicate with associates
- fixations on a particular mode of clothing, colors or wear a particular logo on their clothing. Some gang cultures have the preference on a particular clothing style; for example, Burberry and Dr. Martens are frequently worn by some gangs.
- has bruises and wounds that seem related to fighting
- shows interest in gang related news, media and activities
- has more cash or valuables than one might reasonably expect
- has in possession dangerous implements that could be used to harm others, such as stilettos, ice picks, baseball bats, etc.
- fearful of arousing police interest
Monitor Your Teenager's Progress in School
Teenagers who do well in school usually do well in all aspects of their lives. It also keeps them busy and away from negative peer associations and keeps them level headed in decision making.
One of the many causes for poor academic performance is misguided kids falling to become at risk. At risk youth are those who are “at risk” of failing academically, for one or more of any several reasons. According to The National Center for Education Statistics, at risk is usually caused by negative peer pressure, living in an unfavorable environment, changing schools and residence at inopportune times and the emergence of bad habits and lifestyles.
Put Your Teen in a Safe Environment
The environment will always be a critical place for success. For this reason, experts always recommend on fostering a positive environment at home where there is lots of love and care, as well as structure and discipline. If you are unsure whether you or your home can commit to this level of care and attention ultimately needed by your kid, try to put him or her in a place where all these requisites for change are met. There are some types of environments that have the best chance of rehabilitating troubled or at risk teenagers, or teenagers with learning related problems. A good example is teen boarding schools.